Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
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