Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
what has become of my life if the best thing thats happened to me this week is that i discovered my cleavage as the best hiding spot ever for weed.
i'm telling everyone you had sex with a puerto rican drug lord
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
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