I need help removing her.
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
Just want the two of you to know, I went to a golf tournament today. Respectable, expensive… Flipped the golf cart. Seriously, I'm 40. What the fuck?
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
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