I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
A university police officer just hhigh fived me when i drunkenly stumbled into Aderhold. Fucking 5 o'clock somewhere.ITS IN CASABLANCA RIGHT NOW! TIME ZONES!
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
dropping lines from Workaholics has slowly become my icebreaker when hitting on girls. who would have thought "lets get weird" would cause girls to actually get weird
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
TURNS OUT they were both cheating. Like the Gift of the Magi except for shitty people
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