we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
Speeding home on my break at work because I forgot to grab my Percocets that I have because getting through work sober's too hard
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
Randomize
