he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
i think i just naturally attract stoners
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
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