so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
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