thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
You passed out in the bathroom with the door locked. Had to take a shit in your litter box. Don't worry, your cat buried it for me.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
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