OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
He tried to fight me not realizing that I work as a bouncer in the the same bar we were in. His night ended with him in handcuffs, missing teeth, PLUS I got his shots that he ordered since he didn't get to drink them.
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
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