I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
Aw. You're having cute FaceTime with your fiance, I'm trying to convince myself not to booty call a 42 year old. #adulting
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
Randomize
