beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
In all seriousness, if tomorrow night becomes a heated game of Which Ex Gets To Take The Plastered Birthday Girl Home, I'm going to bow out with my integrity intact.
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
Randomize
