I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
I really thought I'd be the only alcoholic drinking alone in my car at noon in the Lowe's parking lot. Passed out dude in the car next to me begs to differ.
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
My mom just told me I look like darth vader. how's your night?
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
You passed out in my backseat like a legitimate infant. A really drunk, really horny infant
Randomize
