so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
Mike and I just ate the lobster we found in the toilet
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
my car smells like vomit and bananas. this can't really be my life.
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
Randomize
