at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
You slow danced with your carpet steamer last night.
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
Randomize
