No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
Randomize
