So I have exactly 420 dollars saved up in tips from the past week. I win, and I take that as a sign from god that I am allowed to use that money to buy drugs.
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
Well, we broke up and instead of putting my shit out on the curb like a normal person, she fucking donated everything to Goodwill. So now I have to pay two dollars for one of my own t shirts.
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
You know you drink too much when the bartender at your favorite bar recognizes you at chipotle with your sunglasses on.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
