Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
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