it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
cat food counts as protein by the way
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
His idea of romance is drunkenly leaving me dead dandelions on my car in the middle of the night
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
Randomize
