shit! I think I may have lost something in your car. Look for anything that can possibly belong to me, especially look out for a pair of pink panties in a ziplock. I lost my spare and you better find it before someone else does.
PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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