uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
Well sundance is in town and Im going to use my one and only shot to bang Taylor swift... Does it count as a random if shes famous?
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Randomize
