who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
My bed is full of blood and feathers
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
Randomize
