On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
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