He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
Apparently I was pointing at birds and yelling "YOU USED TO BE A DINOSAUR!!!"
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
Randomize
