so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
i just yelled "run, its godzirra!" to an asian kid who looked confused by the tornado alarm test
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
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