My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
Randomize
