everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
Did you get drunk between now and two texts ago?
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
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