Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
i just ordered an al pacino with double mocha at starbucks.. i'm waiting to see how long it takes the chick to realize what i said.
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
You showed up at my apartment after 3 am wasted with a plate of cookies and tried to hook up.
Sorry about that. Except for the cookies.
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
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