I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
I mean how do you tell a nurse in the ER that you dislocated your knee giving a blowjob to your boyfriend.
Very innocently.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
Maybe singing about how you'd bang Morgan Freeman to the tune of Single Ladies while holding champagne and a box of Cheerios wasn't the best first impression on his parents
Randomize
