Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
Randomize
