before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
I'm resourceful. I forgot we don't have coca cola so now I'm drinking Jack & Dew or Mountain Daniels. Also, I haven't decided on an official name yet for this drink. I'm leaning toward Jack & Dew
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Randomize
