if only i could text you this smell
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
Randomize
