no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
i just wanna skin you and wear you like last years versace.
you may have the big hair, fake nails, and talk with a fake accent, but you will NEVER be a housewife from new jersey so STOP TRYING.
WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
Just had my ass outlined on a bar top with permanent marker and then they carved the imprint into the wood with a knife. I'm famous in the country!
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
If I had your ass I would rule the world
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
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