THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
I guess "hi, I know your mom, she taught me in high school" is an effective pickup line
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
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