i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
There's a Russian superstition that you'll spend your year the way you celebrate New Year's, so I'm honestly not that surprised you're drunk.
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
After returning from the hospital with lock-jaw from getting tackle at the game. Some naked chick busted out of his room and hit him with a devastating haymaker to the jaw because he wouldn't have sex
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