i already hear my dad disowning me
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
Randomize