All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
it glows. i had to have it.
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
Randomize
