There was a fist fight in my basement last night at four in the morning, in case you were wondering
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Randomize
