how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
I had to break up with her. She was sending me study schedules and recipes for vegan lasagna. I’m just trying to survive man
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