i just overheard my mom tell my dad he should drink less so he could hit the right hole
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
Why did I wake up with a skeleton in my bed? Is it from the lab?
Oh crap, that's where it ended up. Yeah, don't ask.
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