Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
I love when Facebook suggests people I may know. Well, yeah, I know him. He's my drug dealer. Pretty sure I want to keep that relationship strictly professional.
Randomize
