still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
Nothing says "I support my fellow man" like taking your friends recently divorced dad to a strip club and bar hopping with us to get him laid by an upgrade.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
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