i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
I just watered my plants with apple juice. Look what you made me do.
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
Tonight, a friend walked in and said "oh look at that. Drunk on the living room floor. Just as expected." this is my life. This is my life.
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine"
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
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