Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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