Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
Chasing my kid around a 30' jungle gym was not how I envisioned spending the day off work to recover from a vasectomy.
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
Randomize