I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
Dude someone is playing the piano in the other room while I shit and it's making it really peaceful
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
Bad news: I found out that girl you want has a boyfriend. Good news: she'll probably cheat on him with you. Better news: after seeing the way she treats him, that's the most interaction you're going to want with her anyway. Trust me.
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
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