like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
I forgot i ate a salad for dinner, so while i was barfing in his toilet, i kept screaming "i ate leaves?? i cant believe you let me eat leaves!"
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
I’m not spending 14 dollars on a margarita unless it’s rimmed with cocaine... actually do you have a blender?
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
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