Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
Randomize
