i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
When I left you, you were walking into a room with a half naked girl. When I returned 2 minutes later, you were locked out of the room naked and she was screaming obscenities from inside. How do you manage to make every girl hat you?
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
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