What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
I'm pretty sure I just had a convo with my hot pockets about how they weren't good enough for the oven.
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
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