The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
I picked the lock on the bathroom door and sang him a song while he pooped. Why is he mad?
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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